Showing posts with label politics. Show all posts
Showing posts with label politics. Show all posts

Wednesday, November 30, 2011

The Herald Sun vs. The Growling Grass Frog

The Herald Sun has offended us all in the past, but there comes a point where you have to say ‘enough is enough’. For me, that moment came most recently when the Sun started picking on the Growling Grass Frog (Litoria raniformis) for being a hindrance to Melbourne developers - Growling grass frog cost $2.6 billion, Herald Sun 29th Nov 2011.

The contention of the article is that these local amphibians are halting development in some of Melbourne’s growth corridors. 'Fair enough' you may say, the presence of these frogs can affect development due to their designation as an endangered species in Victoria. But the Sun isn’t interested in being fair. From the outset the article transparently supports development over endangered species, saying that land has been made ‘worthless’ and then, without any supporting evidence whatsoever, questioning whether the species really is endangered.

Can we assume that the sources they quote will shed some light on the issue? Nope. Here’s state planning minister Matthew Guy with his take on Litoria raniformis: “I don’t know if it is endangered,” That’s right - this man who can’t even be bothered to Google: “Growling Grass Frog endangered?” was deemed relevant enough to be the first source quoted in this article. For the record, the Growling Grass Frog is classified as ‘endangered’ in Victoria and is classified as ‘vulnerable’ at a federal level. Why is it classified as endangered? Because its population appears to be decreasing. Why is its population decreasing? A number of factors, but overwhelmingly because its habitat is being destroyed or degraded. That's why we have laws in place to limit development in the habitats of vulnerable species such as the Growling Grass Frog.

Although only a brief article, the story reaches a surreal level of breathtaking inanity in the final sentence. Urban Development Institute of Australia chief executive Tony De Domenico is quoted as saying how frustrated he is at being thwarted by endangered species in his development dealings. (Funny how the article only contains quotes from people sympathetic to development and not, you know, people who know things about ecology and frogs and stuff, isn’t it?) "Some of these so-called endangered species are so endemic they are found everywhere." says Tony. This statement is so astonishingly stupid that it almost defies belief. For those who don’t know - Mr. De Domenico for example - ‘endemic’, when referring to a particular species, means that it is restricted to a particular area. Tasmanian Devils are endemic to Tasmania, Dodos were endemic to Mauritius, and Growling Grass Frogs are endemic to parts of south-eastern Australia. Endemic is the exact opposite of ‘found everywhere’. Ignorance, it would seem, is endemic to the Herald Sun.

If the Sun is opposed to Growling Grass Frogs halting development, fine - write an opinion piece about it, instead of wasting everybody’s time with this sort if pseudo-journalism. Maybe if the Sun actually considered consulting experts who had some clue as to what they were talking about, we wouldn’t be assailed with ignorant scribble like this. But that’s not the Sun’s style; they have shown time and again that they’re not interested in hearing from scientists unless they can be used to reinforce their preexisting beliefs. Let’s hope that enough people see through this sort of nonsense and put their support behind species like the Growling Grass Frog to ensure the success of their populations in stressful habitats like the Melbourne area.

Wednesday, January 9, 2008

A Review of American Presidential Candidates

In Australia, the parties select their leaders, but in America the people get to chose. State by state. These elections are called the Primaries. There's a lot of voting in American democracy. You vote like a motherfucker in this country. I write this from New Hampshire, USA where the election is taking place right now. Politics hasn't been this exciting since a few months ago when the now former Australian Prime Minister John Howard lost the election. So today I saw a shitload of placards and I also met Bill Clinton. This was in Exeter, New Hampshire. He had a pasted on smile and his eyes were vacant and glazed like donuts. It was weird. I've seen this look before. It was in the eyes of David Beckham while he was dressed as a Roman warrior. He was standing in a pile of Pepsi cans at the time. I wanted to ask Clinton what World Domination feels like but the answer is obvious (pretty fucking good!). A Secret Service guy brushed past me and I noticed the bronze glint of a pistol butt within his opened jacket. These guys all looked so ordinary which is probably the point but I was thinking I could fucking take these wimps. Clinton tried very hard to appear ordinary but we all know that for a short time not long ago he was one of the most powerful people in the history of the world. I'm haunted by that experience. Clinton was creepy. But it's a great time to be in New Hampshire right now because everyone is talking politics. This is my assessment of the contenders:

THE REPUBLICANS (aka the fucking GOP)
The four major Republican candidates are four of the scariest guys EVER. They seem like the types to suffocate babies while nobody's looking. Maybe they are the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse?

Shitt Romney - Mormon Fascist.

Rudy Guiliani - Heartless Bastard. He looks like a mobster.

Mike Huckabee - I DON'T heart Huckabee.

John McCain - I like his anti torture stance but I don't like his stringent bomb Iran stance (which you can see on YouTube).

THE DEMOCRATS

Hilary - She is so fucking Establishment it's sickening. She acts like her presidency is inevitable and her 'vote for me because I'm a woman' platform is fucked up and very undemocratic. Does she really understand women or does she just understand rich women? Maybe Condi Rice will vote for her.

Obama - This guy seems to be the best. He seems to be the most likely one to change stuff for the better. When I hear him speak I don't get that horrible weighted feeling of dread I get with all the other candidates. I know people think he's inexperienced but people said the same shit about Kevin Rudd (Australia's PM) and it's worked out fine. Better than expected actually. So the inexperienced factor doesn't bother me.

John Edwards - Boring smarmy prick.

Mike Gravel - It seems like nobody has heard of this guy except my uncle and there's no way he'll get elected because he speaks the truth (and nobody has heard of him). He's 77 and talks about how military spending is obscene (437 billion per year last I heard, and that was before the surge), and how the healthcare system is messed up etc etc.

America is hurting for preferential voting. That way voters could give candidates like Gravel a voice. With preferential voting the politicians would get a better understanding of the electorate. The all or nothing system in place now is less democratic because it forces voters away from candidates they would vote for but for whom they don't think have a chance. People like Gravel could still get votes with a preferential voting system and it would give voters more power, and that is how democracy is meant to work.

The Cambrian Explosion officially endorses John McCain for the Republicans and Barack Obama for the Democrats.

Tuesday, October 16, 2007

Malcolm Turnbull and the Third World

Malcolm Turnbull don't give me that shit about Tasmania's new pulp mill 'operating under the most stringent environmental conditions in the world' because I know that you know that deforestation is happening most rapidly in the following countries: Brazil, Bolivia, the fucking Congo, Indonesia and Australia. We are up there with some of the most fucked places on earth - those countries don't regulate their timber industries! Tassie's pulp mill will have the most stringent environmental standards by default, because any environmental standards are more stringent than no environmental standards. I don't buy your bullshit!

Tuesday, July 3, 2007

Transforming foreign policy

One of my earliest memories is of Christmas 1985. This was the year that I got my very first Transformer. It was a triple Transformer that could transform into a tank, a plane and, of course, an evil robot. Like a lot of children, I generally preferred the bad guys within most toy-based good/evil dichotomies. They looked cooler, they came in better colours and they had the most devastating weapons - my first transformer had the capability to shoot plastic projectiles. Memories of the Decepticons of my youth were no less diminshed when I saw the Transformers movie last night. The computer graphics are incredible, the storyline and dialogue are not as appalling as you would expect for the genre and the actors are likeable. One of the most striking things about the movie is what a nice bit of P.R. it is for the U.S. military. The first appearance of a Transformer in the film is when a Decepticon trashes a U.S. army base in Qatar looking for U.S. intelligence. The only survivors of this attack are a plucky bunch of soldiers whose first hand knowledge of these robo-terrorists makes them invaluable in the fight against the Decepticons. Thank god for the military! I couldn't help but think that the director was trying to imagine a world where everyone actually approved of the U.S.'s military actions in the Middle East. Who's going to argue with the Bush administration if they declare a 'War on Evil Robots'? A CNN poll taken on 24/6/07 showed that 67% of those polled were opposed to the U.S. war in Iraq. If Bush wants to remain politically viable, he needs to move away from Iraq and address real threats to our way of life, ie. evil transforming robots from outer-space. Here are excerpts from an actual speech made by President Bush (as altered by me to make it look like he's fighting a War on Evil Robots):

"Earlier this year, I laid out a new strategy for defeating the Decepticons. I wasn't pleased with what was taking place on the ground or in the depths of outer space. I didn't approve of what I was seeing. And so I called together our military and said, can we design a different strategy to succeed? And this new strategy is different, transformed if you will, from the one we were pursuing before. It is being led by a new commander, Optimus Prime -- and a new ambassador, Bumblebee. It recognizes that our top priority must be to help the Autobot government and its security forces protect their population from attack -- especially in Autobot City, the capital of their homeland, Cybertron. It's a new mission. And Optimus Prime is in outer space carrying it out. Its goal is to help the Decepticons and the Autobots make progress toward reconciliation -- to build a free planet that respects the rights of its robots, upholds the rule of law, and is an ally against the evil Decepticon dictator, Megatron. And it's in our interests, it's in our interplanetary interests to help them succeed. Earth has sent reinforcements to help the Autobots secure their population. I asked the military what they thought the chances of us defeating giant alien robots were. That's what you expect from Earth's Commander-in-Chief, to consult closely with the Earth military in times of inter-galactic cyber-war. They made recommendations, and I sent the reinforcements in to help the Autobots secure their population, to go after robo-terrorists, enormous flying robots and CD players that transform into weird, mischeivous cyber-men that incite sectarian violence so that we can help get the homeland of the Transformers under control. I think it's going to be very important for our country to have faith in the capacity of liberty to be transformative*. After all, there's more to this war than meets the eye."


* That sentence actually appeared in Bush's speech unaltered. I almost wet myself when I found it.